


Thinking Out Loud

by krucxa



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Aromantic, Asexual Character, First Meetings, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Slow Burn, Texting, artist jisung, chan is aro ace, changbin both hates and loves his best friends, changbin is whipped, friendships have a big role in this gjksdh, i thought it was important enought to tag, maybe a little angst?, minho is demiromantic, not a text fic tho, photographer changbin, seungmin doesn't appear in this i'm so sorry, so much fluff omg, the feeling's mutual btw, they're still rappers in this tho, woojin is ace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-22 21:45:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14317809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krucxa/pseuds/krucxa
Summary: hey hyunjinnie, don't forget to buy me my banana milk on your way back!! ヽ(>∀<☆)ノChangbin stared blankly at the new message displayed on his phone.It was from an unknown number, the text not making any sense to him, not to mention the fact that the last time he checked, his name wasn't Hyunjin.





	Thinking Out Loud

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Мысли вслух](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14839224) by [double_knot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/double_knot/pseuds/double_knot)



> okay okay whooo boy this took me so long to write like i actually spend the last two days just locked in my room and writing as much as i could so i could f i n a l l y get rid of this thing omg  
> like my hands are literally shaking by the point that i'm posting this ghsdkjghksd i'm so tired g o d (btw u have no idea how much I hate html rn)  
> btw this is my first fic after their debut!! isn't that exciting?? also it's my longest ever one shot omg
> 
> omg i just realized this had a plot hole n i had to go back and change every stray "hyunjin" to "felix's boyfriend" when changbin wasn't supposed to know his name yet gkshjchs

_hey hyunjinnie, don't forget to buy me my banana milk on your way back!! ヽ( >∀<☆)ノ_

Changbin stared blankly at the new message displayed on his phone.

It was from an unknown number, the text not making any sense to him, not to mention the fact that the last time he checked, his name wasn't Hyunjin.

He wondered briefly if he should reply, his thumb hovering over the screen for a second.

What if it was some kind of a creep? Or maybe Felix was just playing a prank on him?

He sighed, unsure what to do. He had to admit, him getting a text from someone other than Chan or Felix just simply didn't happen, not on a daily basis at least.

_who are you?_ , he finally decided to type, pressing send before he could overthink it.

He didn't even get the chance to put down his phone as his screen lit up with a new notification.

_don't try to pull this on me hyunjin!!!! u owe me 7 boxes of bananan milk and u ain't getting out of it that easily!!! (҂ `з´ )_

Changbin's eyebrows rose up in amusement and he couldn't help but snicker at the words, shaking his head slowly in disbelief.

_I'm not hyunjin. and why would you need so many of them anyway?_

It didn't take any less time for the stranger to reply.

_purposes!! banana milk is the Reason i live to see another day!! and wait, u really aren't jinnie?_

_nope._

After a few seconds went by without any response, he buried his phone into the pocket of his hoodie, and leaving his room to find something to eat.

Honestly, there wasn't really anything healthy in the kitchen. Most of his meals lately consisted of either noodles or a whole box of ice cream. The fact that he couldn't even cook made his situation even worse - sometimes he would even beg Chan to make him something for lunch.

But Chan wasn't here today so Changbin didn't know what to do.

And as he contemplated whether or not try to drink some of the milk that he wasn't sure if it already expired or not, his phone vibrated in his pocket, making him decide that maybe it wasn't the best idea.

He pulled it out, and to no one's surprise, it was a message from the stranger again.

_I'm sorry,, I was so convinced you were my best friend, ahhhh this is so embarrassing,,_

He didn't even think much before writing a reply.

_it's okay. i don't mind_

Contrary to the last text, this came barely seconds later.

_ooooh does that mean that i can still talk to u? (˶ˆ꒳ˆ˵)_

Changbin stared down at his phone, once again questioning his choices. Was he really desperate enough for this?

He could already hear Chan's voice lecturing him that he shouldn't text people he didn't know, but at the same time Felix would probably keep pestering him about the person, whining that Changbin should at least try to make some friends. _You can't just rely on me and Chris only!_ , flitted through his mind, and Changbin startled at just how scarily alike it sounded to the blonde.

And maybe, just maybe he should listen to Felix for once.

_sure._

×

"What's up, losers?" he mutters in form of a greeting, throwing his bag on on ore the chairs around the table, before taking a seat. He ignored the stink eye Chan shot him at the action.

"Felix won't stop texting his boyfriend instead of paying attention to what I'm saying," replied the older, glancing at the said boy from the corner of his eye, who unsurprisingly didn't even hear his name being mentioned, too focused on whatever message he just got, a soft smile pulling at his lips. Changbin would think it was cute, if only the blonde hasn't been acting like this basically every second Changbin saw him.

"Hey, idiot," he whispered, kicking the younger under the table, making Felix yelp in a betrayed way.

"Why would you do that?" whined the blonde, clutching the hurting leg as he glared at the culprit. Changbin lifted one eyebrow, unamused, while Chan just stared at them, clearly done with their bickering.

"Can you stop acting all whipped and actually talk to us for once?" muttered Changbin in reply, feeling his eyebrow rise even higher in exasperation, and Felix just smiled back at him sheepishly. His hand was ruffling nervously through his disheveled hair, not helping with the mess in any way.

If Changbin had to be honest, Felix was just that, a mess.

The blonde boy could never fully concentrate on one thing, _unless it was centered around his boyfriend_ , added Changbin bitterly. He often forgot when they agreed to meet up, and he never bought his own food, just always stole some of Changbin's fries or a bite out of Chan's homemade sandwiches.

Sure, it was a little irritating, but despite his complains, Changbin liked it that way. Felix was one of his two best friends - honestly, only friends, if you thought about it. And even if the blonde frequently cranked him or acted a little dumb sometimes, Changbin still wouldn't take anything over Felix, nor Chan.

On the other hand, Chan was the oldest of their little troublemaker trio - he was the most hard working, and not even in a good way. He just didn't know when to stop, and because of that Changbin found himself dragging the older to his bed to finally rest. People usually seemed to think that Chan had his life all figured out already. And yeah, he did seem that way at first, but Changbin knew him too well to believe in this.

In the end, they were all just walking disasters that tried to act like your usual responsible adult should. It was easy to fool someone into this if they didn't really care, but at least they could always just come to the other two without fearing that they'd get laughed at.

So Changbin was really thankful for his friends, no matter how many times he acted angry with them.

Both Chan and Felix knew that he was just a big softie, even if he always denied it to save his, even if non-existent, pride.

"So what did you wanted to tell us so badly that you made me ditch biology?"

Chan's voice pulled him out of his thoughts and he nibbled at his lip, thinking of the simplest way to put what recently happened into words.

"Someone... texted me on accident recently," he explained in the end, his fingers tapping unconciously on the phone.

Chan's eyebrows furrowed, and he glanced at the youngest before his gaze locked on Changbin once again, while Felix just made a surprised noise, leaning in slightly.

"And?" he pressed in further, his eyes widening in excitement, and Changbin just looked away, scrunchig his nose.

"I kinda... told them they can keep on talking to me?"

His voice wavered at the end, wincing at the chocked out sound that Chan let out at the words. He dared to steal a glance at the older, who seemed to be torn between shock and satisfaction.

He probably couldn't decide if he should scold Changbin for that or congratulate him for finally talking to someone besides him and Felix. Yeah, Changbin knew him long enough to tell it from the look on his face.

Honestly, he'd probably react the same way if he was in Chan's place.

"Oh my God!" screeched Felix, and there was suddenly a pair of arms circling his shoulders, shaking him wildly.

He groaned, slapping at the boy's hands, but the blonde didn't falter, his smile only widening instead.

"Is our little Binnie coming out of his shell?"

Okay, no, Changbin takes back everything he said before. Felix is an asshole, case closed.

"You little shit."

His mutter was followed by a high pitched screech as he caught the younger in a choke hold, Chan just shaking his head at them on the other side of the table.

If anyone stared at them, the oldest just acted like he didn't know the other two, just turning around and sipping his coffee in silence.

He had a reputation to uphold, after all.

×

_hyunjin's an asshole._

Changbin read the text again and again, his mind hazy from sleep and unable to understand the words. It was six in the morning. Who even messages people at such an hour?

He squinted at the glaringly light screen, contemplating just ignoring the other and complain later for waking him up at ass o'clock, but decided against it.

_what did he do this time?_

_he stole my banana milk. a g a i n ヽ( `д´*)ノ_  
_now he owes me like 8 (⇀‸↼‶)_

He couldn't help but snort at the text, finding the whole situation hilarious.

_why do you love it so much anyway?_

_u don't understand. it's a blessing from gods!!_

_is it really that good?_  
_you know, i've never actually tried it._

It took a little longer this time for the other to reply, and Changbin found himself slowly dozing off before the ping of a new notification startled him awake.

_rdksgdkshdksh literally w h a t. are u doing with your life_  
_G O AND DRINK SOME RIGHT NOW U F O O L_

_there's no way i'm leaving my bed at 6 am dude_

_then i have no choice._  
_where do u live?_  
_i'm gonna m ake u try some_

_can't really do that if i don't tell you ☆_

_damn._

He stared at the word for a few seconds, a small smile pulling at his lips despite himself, and he wondered briefly whether he should leave the conversation at that or not.

 _btw,_  
_go to sleep. you should rest_

_oh!_  
_i didn't even realize how late it is ＞＜_  
_thanks_

_yeah, yeah. goodnight._

_night night!! (´• ω •`) ♡_

It didn't take him long to fall back asleep, the phone laying next to him on one of his pillows, the bright screen lighting up his room gently.

It dimmed barely a few minutes later, just as the person he's been talking with fell asleep as well.

×

The place was extensive but not to the point that you'd call it enormous, crowded and hot. Sweat was dripping down his neck, wetting his shirt as he spit fire into the mic, but he wouldn't have this any other way.

He swayed to the beat of the song, accenting his words with an eye roll that earned him a few screams from the audience, and he smirked before letting Chan rap his own verse.

This was what he loved so much, what he waited for every two weeks, while writing down lyrics that came to his mind at random times and composing music late at night, with Chan on the other side of the room.

Only this, and photography, could make him feel this way, just the pure passion in his chest, the pull of excitement, the adrenaline filling his veins.

As he stared at the crowd from under his cap, pulled low enough that people could barely see his eyes, he wished he could take a photo of it, save it all in one picture, just so he could look at it when the insecurity shows itself an unexpected hours - so that he'd remind himself, that all of this, was because of him.

He and Chan came here to show their skills off every show, which had its place every two weeks.

Sometimes they would rap together, sometimes separately, but the audience always loved it nevertheless.

They never really tried to hide their faces, as they both decided it would be just a waste of time, even though they didn't go by their real names either.

His stage name was SpearB, while the older simply called himself CB97.

One time Changbin even heard a group of people talking about them, their voices, their faces, until the topic changed so much that he found himself thinking _Christ, calm the thirst_.

At those times he had to admit, he was glad for the somewhat anonymity.

And as always, as the song ended, followed by even louder screams, he waved at the crowd, satisfied with his own performance, before kicking Chan in the shin lightly and leaving the scene.

Even if he loved performing with all of his heart, being able to change into new clothes eight after, just to step into the crowd this time was really nice too.

In the audience, people didn't really look who they were standing next to, not to mention just how dark it actually was, so the chances of him getting recognized were practically non-existent.

And being able to cheer for other artist that performed here as well was honestly an experience.

But what he wasn't expecting was the rapper that he saw for the first time here. It was just a few songs after he left the stage, when an unfamiliar silhouette walked in, seeming neither confident nor shy, just... experimental.

"Sup, you can call me J.One!" was all the warning he got before the music started.

And as the guy opened his mouth to rap, the breath got knocked out of Changbin's chest.

He stood motionlessly in the audience, ignoring all of the shoves from the crowd going wild around him, as he gaped at the newbie.

The thing is, the newbie was good. Like, really good. Fascinating kind of good. It shouldn't be possible, unless he's done it before, just somewhere else. Honestly, his rap flowed so smoothly that Changbin guessed he couldn't be an amateur.

And in the end, he couldn't help but stare.

Right before the performance ended, he still stood as still as a rock, too amazed to even fully focus, but then he saw the guy's eyes fall into him, and wait, did that really just happen?

Before he could think of it more, the other was already leaving the stage, but Changbin could still feel the burn of his gaze on himself, and the wink the he sent his way.

×

He was cleaning his room when his phone went off, and he didn't even have to check to know who it was.

At this hour, Chris was usually too busy with either composing or taking a power nap to text him, and Felix was now on a date with his boyfriend, which Changbin's already hard too many details about even before it started.

So it was only obvious that it was from the stranger. Or was it really a stranger at this point?

He walked up to where his phone was laying on top of the nightstand, his eyes scanning through the message quickly.

_hey_  
_i've never actually asked u for ur name?(・・;)ゞ_

Changbin hummed as he grasped the phone. He was right, they haven't even exchanged names yet. Felix would probably laugh his ass off at him if he knew.

Changbin noted to never mention thay fact to the blonde, just to spare himself from the embarrassment.

 _hm_  
_i guess you're right_

_won't u tell me ur name then? (･ω <)☆_

_nah_

_but i wanna knoooow ｡ﾟ(｡ﾉωヽ｡)ﾟ｡_

He snickered at the text, considering his options. He could, technically, tell the other his name. It's not like he was trying to hide his identity or anything.

Even if he enjoyed teasing the stranger a little bit more than he probably should.

_what's in it for me then?_

_i'll stop pestering u!!_  
_well. for some time at least._  
_also i just got a paper cut soooo_  
_i'm hurt o(TヘTo)_  
_won't u be nice to a person in pain¿?_

"Cute," he murmured under his breath. His fingers felt slightly tingly for some reason that he didn't dare question, and he couldn't help but smile down at his phone.

 _okay, okay._  
_i'm Changbin._

_!!!!!!_  
_that's a cute name!!_  
_i'm jisung ( ˙꒳˙ )_

He mumbled the name a few times, testing it out. It was nice. It sounded nice.

He had no idea why Jisung said that his name was cute. Obviously Jisung sounded way cuter, and it's not even like he was biased or anything.

_does the paper cut still sting?_

_ooooooh you care!! *¯ ³¯*)_

_well idk_  
maybe i was hoping that you bled to death or something?

_um okay. rude_  
_but yeah i'm okay now!!_

_what a tragedy_

_s h u t up!!!!! (」＞＜)」_

He smiled at the screen one last time before putting it down and looking around his room.

There was a shirt thrown carelessly onto his chair, and a stray pink sock lying in the corner of the room.

He sighed.

The laundry wasn't going to make itself, was it?

×

He never really understood why people loved the idea of romantic soulmates so much.

He's seen this topic mentioned a lot, heard his classmates talk about finding that one perfect person, read about people who believed that in the end, you were destined to be with the one ideal lover.

Honestly, he found it a little overrated.

Not to say that he didn't believe in romance, or didn't feel anything romantic towards people - that's be Chan - but a lot of people seemed to forget that love wasn't always romantic.

Sometimes, just sometimes, when he slept over at Chan and Felix's place, he let his thoughts wander to this topic.

It passed through his mind at the sight of Felix sprawled over the couch in their living room, his hair all over the pillow Changbin was pretty sure Chan put there when the older noticed the blonde already asleep. His lips parted, light snores leaving his mouth every now and again. Face bare of any make up, making it easy to spot the freckles adorning his face.

Changbin smiled softly. The boy used to hide his freckles all the time, but he saw the blonde doing it less and less since his boyfriend finally confessed. He's heard the boy complimenting Felix's freckles enough to know what was up.

On the other side of the room, Chan was sitting by the table, his face smushed into a notebook, fast asleep. His eyes were accented by dark circles, making Changbin concerned over just how little rest he got recently. He murmured something inaudible under his breath, but fell silent as Changbin poked his shoulder cautiously.

It was amusing, he had to admit.

It's on nights like this, when he can't fall asleep, that he realizes just how much he adores these two losers he got to call his best friends. It's the moment he agrees that he doesn't really deserve their friendship, not really in a self depreciating way - he just couldn't understand how such amazing people would want to spend their time with him. But he wasn't complaining, of course.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Felix shifting slightly in his sleep, clutching his phone in his hand tightly as he called out a shortened version of his boyfriend's name, before calming down once again.

Without thinking it over any further, he took off his jumper, putting it on top of Chan's shoulders gently. The older didn't react in any way, and Changbin just pet his curly hair before turning around and glancing at Felix. _Might as well try to fall asleep again_ , passed through his mind as he lied down beside Felix, cuddling into the taller boy's back with a satisfied hum.

This time, it didn't take him much longer to drift off.

Yeah, you could say he considered them as his own, platonic soulmates.

×

Photography classes were fun.

Just... not the technical ones.

He turned to glance out the window, the ramblings of the teacher barely peeking by his thoughts, and he rolled his eyes subtly when he was sure no one was paying attention to him.

Sure, they were important and all, if he wanted to become a photographer - but yeah, that's the thing. If.

He really liked photography. Maybe he'd even go so far to say that he truly loved it.

He just didn't know if it was what he actually wanted to do with his life.

Yeah, if he ended up as a photographer, he wouldn't really complain or anything It just wasn't his ambition, not really.

The thing is, he had no idea what exactly was his ambition.

Before he could overthink it, and possibly fall into an existential crisis which would probably lead him to having a panic attack in the middle of the lesson - his phone vibrated in his pocket, and he checked if the teacher wasn't looking in his direction, then pulled out his phone.

_i'm having an art block. h e l p_

He stared at the words written on the screen, lifting one of his eyebrows in amusement.

 _draw a cat._  
_like a rainbow cat or something idk_  
_like who doesn't like cats man_

Something collided with the back of his head gently, and he turned his head to see a ball of paper tumbling on the ground.

He glared at the students behind him.

_omg you're a genius!!!!! o(*°▽°*)o_  
_i knew i could count on u ฅ(•ㅅ•❀)ฅ_  
_what are u doing btw??_

 _i'm i'n my photography class_  
_but this one's boring, cause it's just theory._  
_also lowkey having an existential crisis but that's nothing new i guess_

_oh noooooo_  
_[image ]_  
_have a cat to cheer u up!! ˶˙꒳˙ )_

It was a simple picture of a sketched out, cartoony kitten, staring off into the distance, its eyes wide and ears perked up like it was listening to something.

Changbin stared at the drawing, his lips parting slightly in disbelief.

He ignored another ball of paper that hit his back just a second later.

_how did you manage to draw something so pretty in such a short time?_

_eh_  
_it's really nothing?? just a doodle lmao (ノωヽ)_

 _dude you're really good._  
_the only thing i'm good at is photography :/_

_ooooh show me!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧_

He nibbled at his lip, before checking the gallery. There was one photo he recently took of Felix in the school studio, the boy hiding his eyes behind his hand, a wide smile on his face. The lighting shined gently on his hair, making it look just as soft as Changbin knew it was. It wasn't easy to recognize it was Felix on the photo, only if you knew him, and his looks, just enough.

The photo was good, really good actually, as it was for his latest project, and he guessed that sharing it with Jisung wasn't a bad idea.

So he sent it.

_HUUUUAAAAAA CUTE_  
_IS THAT U??_

 _lmao no_  
_thay's my best friend._

_damn._  
_i hoped that i'd finally know what u look like ＞＜_  
_still cute tho_

_don't hope for too much, he already has a boyfriend_

_why are the good ones always taken (っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ_

_well i'm not taken so what does that make me_

_my next goal (･ω <)☆_

If Changbin blushed after reading that, the only witnesses were his classmates. 

×

"Stop smiling at your phone like that, you're worse than Felix."

He shot a quick glare at Chan, who was currently sitting on the other side of the couch in his and Felix's living room.

Changbin crashed at their place again, as he always did to be quite honest, and the older has been trying to get Changbin's attention for straight five minutes now.

Not even food worked.

Chan was starting to get concerned.

"No one's as bad as Felix is at acting whipped," murmured Changbin, slightly betrayed that his best friend would even dare to imply something like that.

Chan just lifted one eyebrow, unconvinced.

"Really? Because the way your eyes seem to glint with pure adoration every time you just as much as see a new text begs to differ."

Changbin sputtered at the words, throwing his phone behind him, onto the couch, and he took a good few seconds to finally calm down enough to reply.

"It's not... like that," he defended weakly, hiding his face behind his palms when the older just stared at him blankly.

He could just feel his ears burning from the embarrassment.

"So what's it like, then?"

He peeked out, parting his fingers slightly, just enough to be able to see Chan's facial expression.

Then he went back to hiding.

"Jisung's... kinda cute, I guess. But that's all, we still don't know each other that well," he murmured, trying to explain it in the simplest way possible, and when he glanced at his best friend again, he found the older already smiling at him softly.

"That's okay, take your time," he reasurred, putting his palm on Changbin's shoulder comfortingly, before adding more cheekily, "but do tell me when you both get your shit together."

Just for the comment, Changbin karate chopped him in the neck.

×

It was still the same day when he lied in his bed, in his shared room, alone, scrolling through Tumblr mindlessly.

He didn't have a really popular blog, but just enough that people called him by his nickname, and sometimes he would even wake up to see an ask in his inbox.

It was nice.

He mostly only followed blogs about Pokemon, music, and some that mostly posted cute aesthetics or a little bit of fashion.

His friends didn't know that he had a Tumblr - at least, Felix didn't know.

Changbin saw a mysterious blog follow him once, and it had this really familiar vibe about it, that he was pretty sure it was Chan. He even got a few weirdly amused looks from the older just two days later, so his suspicions might have been the truth, but he was too much of a chicken to ask.

Also, he wouldn't admit to running a cute Pokemon blog. Because he wasn't. Of course not.

It was just a little bit embarrassing. He had a reputation to maintain.

But then, he almost scrolled past it in his boredom, but his eyes locked onto a picture of a puppy, in the middle of running, its mouth wide open and fur all over the place.

It was adorable. Even if he had no idea how it found its place on his dash. But he ignored the confusion that pestered him at the back of his mind, instead focusing on the fact that the picture... made him think of someone.

It couldn't have been Chan, nor Felix. So, who?

Ah.

 _[image]_  
_this reminded me of you_

_?? why? that's a puppy tho?_

_yeah. it's cute_

_oooh are u calling me cute?? <(￣︶￣)>_

_......maybe i am._

_skshskhsldb_  
_oh_  
_o h_

He stared at the text, bobbing his head to the side in confusion. What was that supposed to mean?

_??_

_fjhsjdjd i'm okay, i'm okay_  
_a n y w ay,_  
_i kinda smeared a bunch of paint on my face because of this h a_

Changbin couldn't help but snort at the words, letting his head fall on a pillow, burrowing his face into the soft material, hiding his fondbsmile from the world.

How was it that the boy always managed to make him feel so strangely soft, making his heart pick up its pace with barely a simple text, he had no idea.

But it still happened, and he guessed he had to admit, that after all, he might have been a little bit sappy.

_yeah?_

_yeah,,_  
_[image]_

The picture wasn't much, just barely a close up of what Changbin guessed were Jisung's eyes, but it still made him inhale so sharply that he was worried his lungs were going to give out.

The boy's eyes were open wide and dark, yet the way they seemed to glimmer softly made him remember all those times people kept saying something about all stars being held in someone's gaze - and if so, Jisung's eyes captured the entire universe.

They were a little shadowed by brown bangs that fell in their place in a one, gentle wave, and the picture ended right at the top of his nose, currently smudged in deep, blue paint. Was it the color of the sky at night or maybe the blue of forget me not's - Changbin had no idea. He might have been a photographer, but he didn't really know anything about fancy colors.

He just knew that it only made the galaxy in Jisung's eyes stand out more, and his knees suddenly felt weak for some reason.

_...you have really nice eyes_

He cringed at what his fingers typed out, before adding an uncertain _you loser_ , to make it sound less sappy.

_why, thank u (๑˘︶˘๑)_

He left the conversation at that, burying his face even deeper into the pillow, ignoring the way he felt his munchlax plushie judge him from the other corner of his bed.

×

He hasn't helped his roommate, Woojin, in grocery shopping since...

Actually, he didn't even know. But it was a long time.

Walking through the aisles, pushing the cart lazily and listening to Woojin ramble about whatever came to his mind - it left a comfortable feeling in his chest, and he couldn't believe just how much he missed this.

He let himself smile gently at the older, Woojin grinning his signature cat like smile in return as he put a box of cereal to their cart, currently gushing about his two boyfriends, Minho and Jeongin.

Changbin remembered when the older barely got in a relationship with Minho, how his smiles seemed even wider than they already were, how he would hum a peaceful tune after waking up, contrary to the silent mornigs that Changbin got used to when he first moved in with Woojin.

Jeongin was a new addition to their relationship, even if it was a little complicated at the moment.

"You know how Minho's demiromantic, right? He's not sure of his feelings towards Jeongin yet, he needs some time to figure it out," murmured Woojin, tapping his finger on his cheek as he contemplated buying some sweets.

Changbin stared at him expectantly, hoping for the outcome of him stuffing it into the cart, but deflated slightly when the older shrugged in the end, passing the sweets without a second glance, before continuing, "so for now, they're both dating me, but not each other. I mean, yeah, Jeongin's whipped for Minho, it's pretty easy to tell. We'll just have to see if Minho's gonna feel the same."

Changbin hummed, acknowledging the information, before his gaze locked onto a box of banana milk.

A certain person popped up in his mind, and before he could overthink it, the box was already thrown into the cart. Woojin didn't comment on it, and Changbin was glad he didn't.

"And Jeongin doesn't mind that? Or the fact that you're ace?" he questioned, glancing at the older, only to find him staring at his hands with a fond smile.

"He's a sweet boy. It doesn't bother him, unlike some people," his gaze lost its shine for a second, and Changbin winced, reminded of memories that he'd rather forget, consisting of a crying Woojin and an ex that couldn't understand that no meant no. The good thing was that Changbin got back home when he did and could stop what the person was trying to do before it went too far.

But then, the smile appeared on Woojin's face again, lighting up his eyes once more, and he continued, "I'm really happy that we found him."

Changbin couldn't stop the way his lips turned up at the words.

"And I'm really glad you're happy now."

Woojin's eyes closed as he smiled even wider in reply, and later, when they got home, Changbin found an additional box of banana milk lying on his nightstand, even though he was pretty sure he bought only one.

He didn't forget to thank Woojin by putting his munchlax plushie in the older's arms when Changbin had to leave their dorm, the older still sound asleep.

He knew that the older understood just how important Gyu was to him.

He also knew that Woojin appreciated the gesture.

They knew each other well enough to know this.

×

The next time he goes to show off his own music, the new guy he saw two weeks ago appears once again.

His turn is before Changbin's this time, and he still can't help but admire just how smooth his rap is, how comfortable and confident he seems to be on the stage, and how he's obviously having fun.

When Changbin's on stage, he feels passionate, and he spits out meaningful words he came up with, showing his own thought processes and saying the things he normally doesn't have the confidence to.

But when J.One comes onto stage, it's slightly different.

You can still see the passion he has for it, but there's also something wild about his style. His eyes always locked on the audience, seeming like he's staring right into your soul, and the way he just let's himself move with the music so freely, how he can't stop the wide grin from appearing on his lips, it captivates Changbin.

And once again, he finds himself unable to move, simply staring at the breathtaking show before him.

But when their eyes actually meet once more, he can't help but feel a slip of familiarity in the gaze, yet unsure where he could've seen it before.

And then the piercing look is gone, the guy smiling once more before leaving the stage, and Changbin has to remind himself that he's supposed to go onto the stage right after, so he sprints out of the crowd as fast as, well, as fast as you possibly can leave a crowd.

Which really isn't that fast, and he knows his face must be cherry from the action, and he's already sweating before his performance even starts, but when he sees the same pair of eyes smiling up at him from the audience, he feels his heart race calm down enough to be able to do it.

He drowns in the music, the feeling that the cheering crowd gives him, and for the first time since he came to this place, he takes off the cap that usually hides half of his face in a shadow, letting it fall into the audience, hearing even more screams in response.

And contrary to what he thought before, he doesn't feel too exposed without the simple cap - he only feels free, and he let's himself cherish the moment, smiling at the crowd a little softer than he usually does, before he starts to sing the last verse.

It obviously surprises the audience, but a few seconds later the cheers come back, and he even lets himself giggle the slightest bit when the song ends, the sound muffled by how he brings his hand up to hide it, and when he looks for that one certain pair of eyes, he founded them staring back at him in clear awe, taking him aback.

He leaves the stage feeling just a little bit giddy, his steps unsteady but his eyes cheerful, and later, right before he goes to sleep that night, he unlocks his phone to find two unread messages from Jisung.

_i just heard an angel sing_  
_his voice is so breathtaking, i think i'm falling for someone i don't even know_

The texts remind him of the person he saw for the second time in his life, and he can't help but relate to the other so much. J.One. An intersting one, certainly.

_funny, i'm in the same situation_

And then, he drifts off.

×

"Hey, Felix?"

The said boy turned to stare at Changbin confusedly, his hair falling into his eyes but he played it no mind, instead focusing his full attention on the older boy currently lying on his bed.

"Yeah?" he murmured, his voice even deeper than usually from exhaustion, and he closed his laptop temporarily, just for the sake of having one less distractions from the conversation.

"How did you... know, that you liked your boyfriend?" asked Changbin, the sentence wavering at the end, unsure of the perfect way to put it.

Felix's brows lifted in surprise, and he sat dumbfounded for a few seconds before finally speaking up.

"I think it was kind of obvious? You know, besides all the mushy feelings, I'd find myself looking forward to things that I usually don't really like, just because he would be there," he explained slowly, his gaze shifting to the ceiling in thought, "his touch makes my heart race, and I kinda started to think about doing things with him that I wouldn't really want to do with you or Chris, no offence," _none taken_ , whispered Changbin, "like I'd suddenly have this urge to hold his hands in mine, to interlock out fingers and to leave little kisses on his knuckles, and... okay, judging by your face, you don't really want to hear any of that," he interrupted himself with a chuckle, "I guess that I just found myself unconciously calling him an angel in my mind, comparing his smile to the sun, and all that sappy stuff, until I realized that my feelings for him weren't exactly platonic."

Changbin pursed his lips, locking his eyes on the wall, borderline glaring.

"You make it sound so easy," he muttered under his breath, making Felix laugh openly, and he shifted his glare at the blonde boy in retaliation.

"Don't worry, it night seem impossible to figure out at first," he said, meeting Changbin's eyes with a soft smile, "but later on, it gets easier."

The older groaned, rolling around on Felix's bed before glancing up at the ceiling with a pout.

"Why can't it be easy from the beginning;" he whined, yelping when a shirt flew past, barely missing his face.

"Because you're an impatient fuck," hissed Felix with a cheeky smile, and Changbin was this close to murdering him in that exact moment.

No, scratch that, might as well do that now.

If later Chan had to pry him off the blonde, nobody needed to know.

×

The banana milk was calling for him from where it stood on his nightstand, he was sure of it.

He was in the middle of going through his latest photos, deciding which ones to edit in Photoshop and then show in his project and which ones to save for his own peace of mind - meaning, when his ass starts to feel nostalgic and he can't help but shuffle through his old photos. It happens a little bit too often lately, and He's already earned himself a shove from Felix and a pillow to the face from Woojin after being called a sap.

But he couldn't help it. He liked to save his favorite moments in his pictures.

And yet, he couldn't concentrate, the stupid banana milk calling for attention from the corner of his eye.

He sighed, walking up to his bed and sitting in front of the nightstand, locking his gaze on the drink.

It was a simple yellow box, a few bananas and a tiger, for some reason that Changbin didn't dare question, drawn on the left side, a straw attached to the other.

But as much as it was just it, it also happened to be so, so much more, and when he stared at it, he couldn't help but think about the one person that had this weird passion for the drink.

He put his arms on the nightstand, letting his head fall onto them, his gaze softening the slightest bit, but not leaving the milk.

He wondered what would Jisung say if he knew that Changbin bought himself the stupid drink that Jisung liked so much just because of him.

Would his eyes light up in excitement? Would he pester him about trying it out, then keep on asking if Changbin liked it? Or would he think nothing of it?

No, Changbin's eyebrows furrowed, Jisung wasn't like that. He got excited easily, and he never brushed Changbin off, so why was there a bit of doubt at the back of his mind?

Maybe he was getting paranoid. Or it was just his ignorant brain telling him stupid things.

Then his phone suddenly ringed, and he took it out of his pocket, seeing a new text from the person he was just thinking about.

"Speak of the devil," he murmured while unlocking his phone.

_binieeeeeee 。゜゜(´Ｏ`) ゜゜。_  
_i just fell down the stairs ㅠㅠ_  
_now everything hurts and somehow i got a cut on the cheek,,_

_you okay?_

_not really,,_

 _well, what am i supposed to do about it?_  
_kiss it better?_

_[*jisung will remember that]_

_oh shut up, you nerd_

_love u too ♡_

He shook his head lightly, putting his phone into his pocket and glancing once again at the banana milk.

A few minutes later, Woojin came into their shared room, just to stare confusedly at a blushing Changbin, sipping furiously at the banana milk.

×

Changbin loved his friends. Dearly.

Just, not really when they made fun of his height.

_why am i friends with idiots_

_takes one to know one_

He rolled his eyes at the message, because of course Jisung would say something like that. The smug little shit.

 _thanks_  
_but seriously, they keep making fun of my height_

_oh? why?_

_they say i'm ""smol"""_

_aw don't worry!_  
_i'm not the tallest either_  
_which kinda sucks because i'd love to date someone shorter than me,,_

Changbin's eyebrows went up in amusement. Was Jisung as short as him?

_well, how tall are you then?_

_169 cm_

Damn.

_you're still taller than me,,,,,,_

_really??_

_unfortunately, yeahh_

_oooh ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ_  
_so technically u're a perfect height for me hm hm_

 _oh whoops_  
_look at the time!!_  
_sorry, i have to go b y e_

He threw his phone behind himself, holding his hands to his face and cursing the way that his cheeks stubbornly just wouldn't stop tingling.

Why was Jisung making him feel so... flustered?

Maybe Changbin was in denial, but whatever. He wasn't going to admit anything. Specifically, he wasn't going to admit having a crush. Because he didn't have one. Not a chance.

×

It's two in the morning and Changbin can't fall asleep, no matter how hard he glared at the ceiling or how he cursed his fucked up sleep schedule.

So that's how he ended in his kitchen, still in a way too big for him shirt that he usually wears to sleep, in shorts that barely peek out from under it, and in a fluffy pair of slippers that he got from Felix a few years ago.

Sure, when the blonde handed them to him, he scrunched his nose in mock disgust, but he secretly still used them in his house. Or more like, as secretly as he could with a roommate.

He stared blankly at the wall, running his hand through and accidentally also ruffling up his already tousled hair, while waiting for the water to boil.

He couldn't sleep anyway, so why not make himself some coffee and try to at least do something productive?

He yawned, hiding it behind his palm without really thinking about it.

"Why aren't you sleeping?"

Woojin's voice pulled him out of his thoughts. Or maybe actually lack of them - his mind was blank, unable to focus from the sleep deprivation.

He turned around, glancing at the older boy, currently leaning over the doorway, Gyu clutched safely in his arms.

Realizing Woojin was waiting for a response, he shrugged lightly, looking away in shame. Somehow, getting caught by Woojin felt like getting snitched on to your mom, the perfectly mastered _I'm not surprised, just dissapointed_ look in the older's eyes making him feel small.

"Go to sleep, Binnie," called out Woojin, his voice high pitched, and Changbin glanced back at him to see the boy wiggling his plushie around, pretending to be Gyu.

He had to admit, it was cute.

"Do I have to?" he murmured, and wow, he didn't mean to sound so whiny, but he was too sleepy at this point to care.

Woojin just moved the plushie's head up and down, before peeking over it, his eyes wide and expecting.

And Changbin just sighed, letting himself get dragged by the other, until they both ended lying in Woojin's bed, cuddling comfortably, Changbin for once satisfied with how short he was as it only made cuddling with taller people even more enjoyable.

"So, any progress on your boyfriends situation?" mumbled Changbin sleepily, his voice slightly muffled from the way he buried his face in Woojin's shoulder, and the older let out a him, shifting a little bit to a more comfortable position.

"Yeah, kind of. Minho told me yesterday that he wasn't exactly sure, but he might be getting a little, tiny crush on Jeongin," he chuckled tiredly, but Changbin could still hear the fondness in his voice, "and Jeongin is as whipped as always. He keeps buying him flowers in hopes to win his heart over. He didn't forget to get me some as well, though."

Changbin felt like a lightbulb just turned on above his head, and he was pretty sure that if he was a character in a cartoon, a bunch of exclamation points would appear around him as he stared at the older.

"So that's where the roses are from!"

He might have said that a little bit too loud, but Woojin just laughed, clearly not bothered by it.

"Yeah, he's a real romantic. Made Minho have a little gay panic for a hot second."

Changbin couldn't stop the gasp that left his mouth.

"I hope he succeeds in his little mission."

"Yeah, I hope so too. Can you imagine how whiny he would get if he didn't?" he interrupted himself at Changbin's uncontrollable cackle, "no, dude, you don't understand. I'm dating both of them. Just imagine how salty Jeongin would get if I get to date Minho and he doesn't. He'd probably keep on pouting at me until I'd buy him some ice cream to cheer up, or something."

Changbin only laughed harder at that. 

×

_i've just realized_  
_that u've basically seen my face_  
_but i still have no idea how u look like ;;_

He blinked at the words that appeared on his screen, unsure of how to reply.

_what, you want a photo of me?_

_no!_  
_i mean yes!!_  
_fkshdk i mean, if u're okay with that,,_

That's the thing, was he okay with that?

Actually, the more he thought about it, he couldn't come up with any reason not to send Jisung a photo of himself. They already knew each other well enough, and he trusted the younger boy (yes, younger. He barely got to know that fact two days ago, and Jisung already made a few jokes about being younger yet taller. Changbin threatened to block him).

So he quickly went through his gallery, before reminding himself that he barely ever took any selfies.

Guess he had to take one now, then.

Unsure of the angle, he snapped the picture, throwing in a simple peace sign, just because he could.

 _[image]_  
_what do you think?_

_g E O R G E U S_  
_idjAgJsjsGHgdHsh_  
_i mean,_  
_ahem._  
_u need to work on ur selfie skills_  
_the angle is kinda yh_  
_but otherwise cute ˙꒳˙ )_

_i don't know if i should be flattered or offended_

_why not both lmao_

"You little shit," he murmured at his phone, his words contrary to the soft smile pulling at his lips, and Woojin didn't even look up from where he was reading a book on the other side of the room, already used to Changbin's behaviour.

He did whisper a hushed _whipped_ , though.

×

He found himself once again on the stage, but contrary to the what he already got used to happening, this time he didn't see J.One neither in the crowd, nor performing.

The fact made him a little worried.

He might have also stumbled on his words once because of this, but at least the audience didn't really notice. They were too occupied being drunk and dancing in one hot, sweaty crowd that they didn't even notice when his voice wavered the slightest bit.

But right at the end of his performance, when he finally accepted that the other rapper wouldn't show up, he suddenly made eye contact with this so, so familiar pair of eyes, once again opened wide - but this time, it seemed to be in realization, more than awe.

What did he realize though, Changbin wasn't sure.

Before he could think more of it, he left the stage, thinking of leaving the place early and burying under his blankets from the embarrassment - he made a mistake, twice, while performing. It was enough for him to feel bad.

But before he could leave the building, in the little corridor backstage, leading to the exit, someone grabbed his wrist, pulling him back gently, and suddenly his back was against the wall and a familiar pair of eyes was staring right back at him.

This was the first time they stood in front of each other, and Changbin noted that J.One seemed to be slightly taller than him - which he usually would be bitter about, but now it only made him feel flustered.

He could tell the other didn't even know what he was doing, probably done it as an impulse, as just a second later his eyes widened in shock, and he quickly took a step back - but he was still somehow so, so damn close, and Changbin had to remind himself how to properly breathe.

And then he spoke.

"Changbin?"

The said boy's heart stuttered in his chest, and he stilled, as if he wasn't in moving before.

J.One knew his name? How would he even know it? And why?

He nodded, dumbfounded, the action seemingly calming the other down, just a little bit.

"I knew I couldn't be wrong. It's you, it's actually you, oh wow," he rambled, his words rushed, making it hard to even understand what he was saying at this point, and Changbin's heart just wouldn't stop racing in his chest, either from anxiety or the fact that the cute guy actually knew who he was - though Changbin still had no idea who was J.One.

"Wait, stop. You know me, I get it, but who are you?" he choked out in the end, putting his hand in the air to stop the other from rambling, and J.One just stared at him for a few seconds in, was it amazement?

He cursed how he couldn't even tell basic human emotions from people's face expressions. It would be really useful if he did - but his human interaction usually ended at an awkward, two second eye contact with strangers.

Not a memory he'd like to remember.

But J.One's gaze on him seemed to be somewhat soft, somewhat gentle, and he was still so close, so close that Changbin couldn't help but glance down at his lips, before immediately looking away when he realized what he was doing, his cheeks burning from embarrassment.

"I'm Jisung," murmured the boy, his voice hushed, barely audible over the music playing in the other room, but Changbin did hear it and-

Wait.

Jisung?

He whipped his head up so fast he worried he might've got whiplash, and he couldn't help but gape at the younger, who was sheepishly smiling down at him, his hand nervously brushing the back of his neck.

The realization him Changbin hard, and oh, of course it was Jisung - he had the same eyes, the same eyes that held never-ending galaxies in them, the same cute nose, this time clean of any paint.

And Changbin felt like he could just kiss the boy right there, at the exact second, just swoop him up in his arms and leave a light peck on his lips, but his impulse control suddenly kicked in, and he just smiled shyly instead, his hands shaking slightly where they were pressed against the wall, hoping that Jisung couldn't tell just how nervous he was.

"You really are as cute as I imagined you'd be," whispered Jisung, seemingly talking to himself, but Changbin still caught the words and his cheeks flushed even more, if it was possible at this point.

"And you're tall," he mumbled, making the younger chuckle softly in amusement, shaking his head lightly, making his bangs fall into his eyes, and Changbin's hands itched to brush them away.

"Nah, you're just short."

This time though, he didn't stop himself from anything, and Jisung yelped in a not-so-manly way as Changbin elbowed him in the ribs.

×

Being able to cook was a skill that he's never mastered.

While Woojin could just come in the kitchen and make a perfect, healthy meal from basically nothing, in under twenty minutes - Changbin could only glare at his burned bacon paired with undercooked eggs.

When his roommate wasn't home and up for making Changbin something to eat (Woojin found it as his personal mission to make sure that the younger ate regularly, and well, you didn't see Changbin complaining) he would just usually pester Chan until the older would come and make him something better than the instant noodles that Changbin always threatened him with.

But this time, his dorm was empty, and Chan wasn't answering his phone - probably crashed from sleep deprivation, he should make sure that Felix checks up on him - so Changbin decided to make something himself.

But as he chewed on the... could he really name it food? He scrunched his nose in distaste. He had to admit, the thing was barely edible.

Guess he'll have to starve until Woojin comes back.

Just as he stood up to throw the _thing_ away, his phone's screen lit up from where it was lying on the counter, and he paced over to it, excited to see a new message from Jisung.

They haven't talked much about their first meeting in person - it's like they silently agreed to leave it behind, an unspoken rule they didn't dare break.

They didn't stop texting each other though, no, if anything they only seemed to talk even more than before ( _"Why won't you just meet up?_ , asked Felix once, but he just put his hands up in defeat when Changbin shot him a Look. _"It's complicated"_ , murmured the older, and that was all explanation Felix got).

Changbin was glad he was able to control himself that evening and didn't do anything impulsive. He wasn't sure if they would even keep in contact if he did (that didn't stop him from spending sleepless nights, staring up at the ceiling and thinking of galaxies shimmering in wide, wide eyes and moonlit, soft looking lips).

He unlocked his phone, reading the words with a smile that he didn't even bother to stop from pulling at his lips.

_binnie,, i tried to make some pancakes,,_  
_[image]_  
_it didn't go well,,,,, (つω`｡)_

Yeah, the pancakes didn't look so good. Changbin squinted at the photo. Were they even pancakes at this point?

 _it's okay, i'm not that good at cooking either._  
_so i get you_

_i knew u'd understand!! (ง ื▿ ื)ว_

_isn't there anyone that can cook?_  
_my roommate can make some really good food. my best friend as well._  
_i could always ask them to make something for you lmao_

_!!!!!! u're a life saver!!_  
_there's only hyunjin here, and he's even worse than me in the kitchen ㅠㅠ_  
_he almost burnt it once,,_  
_i don't let him in the kitchen since then khsjdhs_

 _then you probably don't want me thwre either, cause i caught on fire once_  
_while boiling some water_

_you w h a t now_  
_how do u even,,_

_¯\\_(ツ)_/¯_

_.......u're too dangerous for ur own good_

_can't argue with that._

×

"I just realized," mumbled Changbin, breaking the silence that filled the room barely a few seconds ago. Felix turned to look at him questioningly, Chan only humming guietly in reply, "that you've never actually told us your boyfriend's full name. Only nicknames. Unless you told Chan, I don't know, but you've never told me, at least."

"I haven't?" repeated the boy, staring at him with wide eyes, bobbing his head to the side in confusion. Changbin just shook his head slowly, murmuring a quiet _not really_.

Chan hummed once again, this time more in agreement than anything.

"I guess it's true, you always keep on calling him some sappy stuff like your flower, sunshine, the reason of your early death, the love of your life, the one and only-" a pillow in his face stopped him from counting any more, while Felix glared at him openly, a bright flush taking over his face and ears that he hid by pulling on his hood, his lips unconsciously turning into a pout.

"Shut up," he whined, kicking his legs as the older hugged the pillow to his chest, shooting the blonde an amused look. Changbin just kind of stared at them both from the side, "it's not fair, I can't tease you back, you're both aro _and_ ace!"

The words earned him a wink from the older, and Felix huffed, giving up.

"Anyway, to answer your question," mumbled Felix, turning back to Changbin with a sheepish smile, "his name is Hyunjin."

Changbin nodded silently, mulling the information over. It was a nice name. Actually, it was also a familiar name. A really, really familiar name.

Changbin squinted at the floor, deep in thought, ignoring the way that Felix stared at him, dumbfounded.

Hyunjin.

Oh my God.

He couldn't help but groan as he finally connected the dots, hiding his head in his hands, only whining even more when a curious hand poked his shoulder.

"Dude, are you okay?"

He peeked out at Felix, showing him the best bitch face he could muster at the moment.

"Do I look okay?" he muttered, glaring slightly harder when the blonde shrugged in response.

"Quick question. Does your boyfriend, by any chance, room with a guy named Jisung?"

He watched as Felix's expression slowly went from confused to shocked, the realization lighting up his face, his eyes widening as his lips parted.

The blonde just sat there, opening and closing his mouth, looking like a lost fish that someone just pulled out of the water, and he brought up both his hands to his face, breathing in deeply, then exhaling and letting his palms point vaguely in Changbin's direction.

"Don't tell me. That this Jisung... the one that gives me shit for, and I quote, acting like a whipped fool, and for liking comedy movies... is actually your big fucking crush since like a few months ago."

Changbin glanced over at Chan for confirmation, the older nodding lightly, and he turned back to Felix with an awkward smile.

"Yeah...?"

And Felix just groaned in reply, pulling at the strings of his hoodie and burying his face in the material, exasperated.

"I fucking hate you, oh my God!"

"Well, that's nothing new," mumbled Changbin under his breath, moving away just in time to not get hit by Felix's well aimed kick.

×

He didn't even know why it happened. His _amazing_ best friends decided that meeting up in a one, big group would be the best way to get each other better - by which, they meant, getting Changbin out of his house and making him actually meet his _crush_.

A first, he didn't really know that it was what they wanted to do. They just simply asked him if he'd want to go to an amusement park with them, and being the trusting fool he was, he agreed.

But with time, they kept telling him about other people that they also invited. He still could hear the grin in Felix's voice when the younger shouted through the phone that Hyunjin would be coming with them.

And he didn't even find it suspicious when Chan told him to invite Woojin, who also layer on invited both his boyfriends, because apparently, the more the merrier right?

But now, as he stood alone by the ice cream stand, looking for his friends, two ice creams in his hands he couldn't help but curse them in his head, glaring at the melting ice cream as anxiety slowly started to poke at his heart.

When they barely got there, Woojin, Minho and Jeongin were already by the entrance, greeting them cheerfully with excited smiles and wildly waving hands.

Minho had both his arms thrown over Jeongin's chest, holding the younger close and shooting pointed stink eyes at any strangers that even dared to glance at the boy, while Woojin was content enough with just standing next to them, one of Jeongin's hands in his own, their fingers interlocked.

As they were coming in, Minho stole a quick peck from Woojin, before going back to backhugging Jeongin like some sort of a koala, and Changbin could feel his eyebrows lifting in surprise.

He guessed that in the end, the whole boyfriend problem did solve itself, and the way that Jeongin seemed to be literally starry eyed as he looked up at both Woojin and Minho made his heart warm for some weird reason.

It was cute, he had to admit, and he found himself happy to see his roommate so fond with the other two.

But he wasn't as happy now.

His two best friends suggested that he gets some ice cream for them. They didn't really want much, just asked him to buy specifically a chocolate one, and maybe one for himself if he felt like it.

He briefly wondered if he should find himself some new friends when he turned back just to find no one where his friends stood just seconds ago.

He turns back everything nice he's ever said about Felix and Chan. They're fucking assholes.

"Changbin?"

The already so, so familiar voice pulled him out of his thoughts, and he whipped his head up, staring at the person that just walked up to him.

A pair of deep, dark eyes was gazing back at him softly, and he noted how he had to look up the slightest bit to maintain eye contact with the boy. His lip was caught between his lips in what Changbin

guessed was a nervous habit of his, and one corner of his mouth pulled up in a shy smile while his hands fiddled with the large, soft looking jumper he was wearing. His hair caught in the light wind, falling into his eyes, before curling back up, and he couldn't help but wonder if the dark locks were as fluffy to touch as they looked like.

"Jisung? What... are you doing here?" he replied, blinking slowly as the younger rubbed his neck anxiously.

"Hyunjin told me to get some ice cream... but before I could do that, I went back to ask him what flavour he wanted, just to see that he wasn't there anymore. Then I saw you," he explained, avoiding Changbin's eyes, and was Changbin going crazy or were his cheeks slightly more pinkish than they were before?

If anything, it was just probably from the wind, he told himself, denying his brain with coming up with any wild guesses.

"My friends did that too, though?" he murmured, but then his eyebrows furrowed and he gripped harder the ice cream in his hands, "don't tell me these assholes planned it all."

"They might have," replied Jisung with a shrug, before pointing at the chocolate ice cream still in Changbin's hands, "anyway, are you planning on eating this? Because I don't know about you, but I love chocolate."

Changbin glanced at it briefly, reaching his hand closer to Jisung dismissively. He felt his cheeks flush when their fingers brushed, but the feeling was gone as quick as it appeared, and he cursed his heart for racing because of something so simple.

"I don't really like chocolate, to be honest," he commented, and Jisung just hummed in acknowledgement.

"You can always hand it to me then. It's literally the love of my life," he glanced quickly around, probably looking for their sneaky friends, pouting when he still couldn't make them out in the crowd that filled the amusement park, "anyway, do you want to go somewhere and actually have some fun? They left us anyway, so it's not like we can really do anything about it."

"Sure."

He couldn't believe how stable his voice sounded despite the way his heart just wouldn't calm down from its furious pace, fluttering up every now and again like some stubborn butterfly, threatening to jump out of his chest any moment. He just hoped he wouldn't stupidly spill his feelings towards Jisung at a random time.

_It's gonna be a long evening_ , passed through his mind, and he couldn't help but agree.

×

As it turned out, Jisung and amusement rides weren't a good combinations. Changbin couldn't even focus on the adrenaline pumping through his body, nor how fast the ride moved, simply because the boy sitting next to him was too distracting.

He'd keep screaming, whining, however you name it, really - his mouth open the whole ride, his eyes blown wide in fear, his hand unconsciously coming to hold Changbin's, and the older didn't even have the heart to push him away, only interlocking their fingers to hopefully help him calm down, at least a little bit.

And as they left the ride, Jisung's hair tousled, showing his forehead for the first time that Changbin has seen him, he couldn't help but feel his heart flip in his chest at the sight.

But despite being scared, Jisung still insisted they go on a different ride, and another one, then even more, until Changbin finally cornered him.

"You obviously don't like them, so why do you insist on riding them?" he asked, not bothering to hide his confusion, and the younger just smiled at him sadly, before his gaze fell to the ground.

"I can tell, that you enjoy them. I didn't... want to take that fun away from you," murmured the boy, his voice suddenly seeming small, as his fingers played with the hem of his shirt.

Changbin's gaze softened, and before he knew it, his hand already reached out for Jisung's own, pulling it closer to himself, making Jisung look up at him questioningly.

"You didn't have to," he mumbled, unable to hold back the smile that pulled at his lips, "we can just go somewhere else instead."

"Like where?"

It was easy to tell that the boy wasn't fully convinced, his gaze downcast once again, but that wasn't what Changbin wanted to see. He wanted to see Jisung smiling, he wanted to see the galaxies held in his eyes, he wanted to make him feel happy, to see him happy.

It was on impulse, really.

"We could go to a café, I know this really nice one. Or we could just go for a walk?" he offered, trying to come up with anything that would make the younger feel better. Jisung must've seen his struggles, because he just squeezed Changbin's hand lightly, a grin lighting up his face, unknowingly making Changbin's chest feel warm.

Leaving the amusement park didn't take long.

Changbin didn't think of it much, as they probably wouldn't meet their friends by now anyway, so he didn't feel the least bit guilty as they walked through the empty streets, hand in hand. Jisung was busy staring up at the quickly darkening sky, his lips parted in wonder, and Changbin couldn't stop himself from stealing glances at him instead. The way his eyes glinted in the dark, the way it made him look so surreal, so magical, it all made Changbin feel a little bit dizzy.

But a good kind of dizzy.

His gaze wandered slowly through his face, admiring the dark locks that once again fell onto his forehead, the soft looking skin, the curve of his nose, until he found himself staring at Jisung's lips, unable to look away.

They didn't look like anything that people always described in romantic novels that Changbin's seen so much of. They weren't exactly cherry red nor did they glint in an inviting way, he'd say they were chapped if anything. But that didn't stop him from feeling his heart's pace speeding up, didn't stop him from thinking just how kissable they looked, how he could just lean in the slightest bit and steal a simple kiss.

He looked up after a few seconds, startling slightly as he saw Jisung already staring back at him, something unreadable in his gentle gaze, stealing the breath out of his lungs.

The atmosphere around them wasn't exactly romantic, nothing really special about the empty streets they walked in before - he didn't even notice when they stopped.

But the way that Jisung's hand circled his waist, pulling him closer, made him feel that this was it. This was what he wanted the most. As long as he was with Jisung, he didn't really care if the situation wasn't what people would usually call romantic. Jisung was enough.

And before he knew it, his eyes fluttered, closing on their own accord, a slight pressure of Jisung's lips on his, and suddenly he could breathe again.

He sighed, pressing just the slightest bit closer, his hands wandering up Jisung's shoulders, just to tangle in his hair, and yes, he noted, it was as soft as he imagined it'd be.

Jisung's lips as well, were exactly how he guessed they would be - slightly chapped, but soft nonetheless, the way Jisung kissed him slow, maybe even a little bit shy.

It was nice. Even more than nice.

After a moment, he pulled back slightly, just enough to be able to look Jisung in the eye, and he smiled softly at the younger, feeling his cheeks flush when the other grinned back.

"Jisung?" he murmured, unable to hold back the cheerful tone in his voice, the boy's eyes seeming to glint even more at the mention if his name.

"Yes?"

"You really need some chapstick."

Jisung's giggle filled the alley, and Changbin couldn't help but feel it was the most beautiful sound he's ever heard.

×

_(Later on, as they cuddled in Jisung's bed, because the younger decided Changbin's house was too far to walk there at the hour, the boy hugged Changbin just a little bit tighter than before._

_"You know, I lied. Hyunjin didn't really tell me to buy the damn ice cream," he mumbled, his voice slightly muffled by how he buried his face in Changbin's shoulder._

_"Why?"_

_"I knew what they were planning, I was actually one of the people that came up with the plan," he interrupted himself with an embarrassed laugh, "I wanted to tell you how much I liked you, but I couldn't come up with a way to do it... until then."_

_Changbin didn't bother to stop the cheesy smile from appearing on his face._

_"You're such a sap.")_


End file.
